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| Double chin- fail! |
More random things:
Teaching ballet camps and art camps on Saturdays.
Going to Imperial Beach
Getting back to ballet!! Yay! I am so glad to be back. I still can't do jumps, and sometimes my knee hurts, but I love my recital dances and the only complaint I have is that I wish I had more classes.
I am going to New York and Europe with Golda for five weeks this summer!
I got a 4.0. Not very hard in eighth grade.
Xanthe got baptized!
I turned 14 and was surprised with a trip to Miami with my mom and sister.
So...... that wasn't a very long list, so it seems like I have just been slacking on the blogging, but I have five dance classes, two guitar lessons, teach five violin lessons and three guitar lessons, Young Womens, plus school, practicing and homework every week. I am not saying I am more busy that any other person in the blogging world, because I am just a kid and I don't have my own kids to worry about. Mostly, what I am trying to say is that I am not organized enough to squeeze blogging in there.
Speaking of having stuff to do, I have a story. I was sitting in science putting lip gloss on because my lips were chapped. I sat by two VERY annoying guys. All they talked about was this dumb cartoon show. I had been putting up with the idiotic jokes ALL YEAR. Finally, I just turned, still holding my lip gloss and said, "You must watch a lot of TV." He looked at me and said, "Oh and what do you do all day? Apply lip gloss?" Oh, the things I wish I could have done, even though I would get in trouble. I just stopped talking and looked away. But ya know what? I was mad. I pretended not to be, but inside, I was absolutely furious. That happens a lot in Jr. High. Like every day. A lot of people think I am a shy weird girl, because I mostly just observe the stupidity of teenagers, rolling my eyes to myself. I don't care if these kids don't understand what I do when I am not in school, but it's the looks and comments I get that really just make me feel like such a nothing. I have friends, but if they aren't with me, I am pretty quiet. That makes SOME of the "popular kids" treat me differently. The stereotyping that goes on is horrible. You have to be a certain thing, or you won't be accepted. When I am in a class with no friends, I sit and observe quietly. It's amazing what people think that makes me. They will talk about things that I know they wouldn't want me to hear, but because I don't say anything, they talk on.
I am not stereotypical. I am not saying that all of the popular people are like this. I am only talking about a few that make me wonder why school has to be this way. If you're not outgoing of beautiful, sorry but your Jr. High years won't be so great. If you aren't in choir, the school play, band, orchestra, or the talent show, you don't have talents. Well I don't believe that. When I say I hate school, that's why. It's a different world, and no one ever thinks of what might be going on in someone's "other world" outside of school.
Another FFJH story. In my art class, I have my best friend.Unfortunately, the rest of the class is full of kids that, let's just say, don't have the standards I do. So my friend's table had a bunch of kids that wouldn't do their work. Instead they would talk about bad things and swear. My friend asked them often to stop, but that made it worse. She finally went to the teacher and told her what was going on. The kids got in trouble, my friend moved tables, and all was good. Until the next time we had art. Now, all of the kids that got in trouble yell out either swear words, or "snitch!" when we walk by. That's Jr. High for ya.
p.s.
I love when I am with my friends. I am always happy around them. and... I am not depressed. I am perfectly happy to be who I am, I just hate how that plays out every day at school because of the way teens think. Also... I know I am a teen, too.
4 comments:
I'm sorry Rubes! Junior High can be rough sometimes and ya I don't think you were made for it. It's a dog eat dog world out there and you're like..... a cat. Like the old cat from Cats. You get what I mean? :) Don't worry DHS will be amazing, I can drive you to eat lunch every day and by then I won't even be crashing into trees! But there will still be immature boys, just a fact of life. And you are beautiful! ~G
Okay, first of all, 5 weeks in New York and Europe? Just the two of you? Amazing.
Ruby... I totally understand your feelings about school. I NEVER liked school because of all the reasons you are talking about. My best friends through all of high school were literally my parents because I didn't have to worry about trying to make everyone feel involved while dealing with the insane amounts of immaturity and crap! I'm sorry that you are going through that...sometimes I wonder how ANYONE could like school, because heaven forbid, I was THRILLED beyond belief to graduate and get away from the vulgarity and cliques.
PS...you're WAY busier than me... ;)
I think I am going to have Brittany read this post so she can feel like she isn't the only one that feels this way! You put into words perfectly the worst parts of junior high, there isn't a one of us that would do it again. Now high school on the other hand was more fun. Oh, and I was just thinking today when you stopped by with your mom that you just get more and more beautiful! But you are right the quiet ones are viewed differently. I know, I was one too. But I am glad you have some good friends, if you are lucky you will still have them when you are my age like I have your mom!
I am so sorry you feel like a nothing sometimes at school. I know what that feels like, especially seeming like an observer rather than a participant. Yet I know that any young girl who can teach someone else, and who does it so confidently, must surely have a sense of worth. Draw on that. Don't measure yourself with a junior high yard stick. It has graffiti and old gum on it, anyway. Yuck.
I wish I could say it gets all better after junior high. Even as an adult you'll face immature people and cliques, and the feeling of being an outsider sometimes. But a relationship with Heavenly Father is never exclusive.
You are great! I am so glad to have you as a role model for Elise.
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